If you asked a handful of soccer fans to describe Diego Maradona what would they say?

Depending on their age and nationality, the answers would differ, that’s for sure. With the World Cup just around the corner I wonder what Diego Maradona is cooking.

My memories of Diego begin in Mexico, the 1986 World Cup where Maradona, lets face it, won the cup with his own boots and hand.

Then I remember the days in Italy where he put Napoli on the map. A small club from Naples all of a sudden became the heavy weights of European Soccer. Anyone my age would remember the sky blue jumpers with the Mars logo on the front.

Now we arrive in Rome 1990 for the Italia World Cup. Maradona has become a God in Italy but is now public enemy number one as he stands in the way of the Azzurri. As fate would have it, he scores a decisive penalty and Italy is bundled out of the world cup.

What I remember the most from that world cup is Maradona crying as they lost the final to Germany. A German by the name of Jurgen Klinsmann stole the cup from his grasp when he conned the referee into a penalty and a red card.

If you look back at the footage, you can’t help think the song “Don’t cry for me Argentina” was written for that very moment.

After the world cup, angry Italians demanded revenge and decided to crucify him for cocaine usage. Did the Italians know this before the world cup? If you think they didn’t, then you should be also expecting the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny and Father Christmas to pay you a visit this year.

Maradona banished into the wilderness only to make the news by shooting a cameraman in the face with an air rifle.

In preparation for USA 94, he hired the services of, wait for it, Ben Johnson the disgraced Canadian drug cheat. Do you remember what happened after the first game against Greece? That’s right, the nurse grabbed him by the hand and led him to the rest rooms for a drug test. I still can picture his face, laughing and smiling at the nurse as if to say, do you know who I am?

What followed after that was a serious cocaine addiction that nearly killed him on several occasions. He also battled with his weight and at times looked like a bloated beast that escaped from the depths of hell.

After several failed attempts in rehab, Maradona found comfort in his long time friend Fidel Castro and beat the habit.

When ageing Alfio Basile quit the national job, Maradona was given the nod to everyone’s surprise.

Argentina just qualified for the World Cup and Maradona took aim at the media after being called everything under the sun.

Translated he said,

“I’m sorry ladies for my words and keep on sucking it. I’m either white or black, but I will never be grey in my life, right? You treated me like you did, now keep on sucking dicks…”

“I’m grateful to my players and to the Argentinian people, I thank no one but them. The rest, keep on sucking dicks. You too Pasman, right, you also have a dick inside you.”

For those that have been living under a rock, go to YouTube and type in “Maradona Press Conference” and watch it for yourself.

After being harassed by the media and being criticized for his team selection and coaching abilities, Maradona had this to say,

“I know how to win the World Cup. You have to put all your heart in it, you’ve got to give your life”.

When all is said and done, Maradona is a survivor and his love for Argentina can never be questioned. Throw Lionel Messi into the mix and you just never know.

Lets see what Maradona has installed for us in South Africa.